As many of my fellow blog subscribers/readers already know, I just turned 50 a little over 3 weeks ago.
Well… let me tell you, I’m not taking this turning 50 thing well at all. I have not exemplified any kind of grace and/or dignity amidst this transitional period from middle age to what I’m now calling old age. I’m in denial and have been complaining about it constantly.
Where to begin… the day before my 50th birthday, I was in a particularly bad mood from the time I got up that morning. I did not really want to talk to anyone >> about anything. Despite my bad demeanor, I proceeded with my daily morning tasks until about the time I knew the morning mail should have arrived. I went to retrieve the mail from the mailbox… and let me tell you, I was not prepared for what was contained therein.
As I’m thumbing through the mail, something caught my eye outside of the usual array of bills and advertisements. At first I thought it was one of those publisher clearinghouse thingies but upon closer examination I started to make out letters on the face of the envelope that read, AARP. I had to stop and think for a moment and then it hit me like a brick, AARP, isn’t that the organization for OLD PEOPLE! I rechecked the front of the envelope before I continued to open the letter because sometimes, I get the lady’s mail next door and I did not want to accidentally open her mail… again. Upon re checking, sure enough my name was on it, my mailing address was on it, so I continued to open the letter from AARP (the American Association of Retired Persons as the envelope stated).
Dear Ms. (a.k.a) FatGirlUSA as your 50th birthday approaches, AARP would like to provide you with this temporary membership card because ”as stated within the letter” >> “No one does more for people 50 and over than AARP. And you can get all the perks and benefits for as little as $16 a year, so fill out the quick membership form NOW”
Who told AARP I was 50, I did not tell them, did any of you tell them? In what government database has AARP been just sitting and waiting until the day, yes, the day, I turned 50 and try to recruit me into their old people’s club.
Even though AARP knew my B’day. What they don’t know is I’m not a joiner. I’ve never joined any organization before, and now that I’m about to turn 50, why in the world would I want to join one now.
The letter went on to state all the wonderful discounts I’m now entitled to NOW THAT I’M turning 50 and all I have to do is show my Temporary AARP card until my permanent card arrived after I sent in $16 for the annual membership fee.
Okay, I was already freaking out about turning 50 the next day… now this.
Let’s stop and take a moment to examine how I got here, here meaning 50 years of “old” age. This whole turning 50 has happened without the provision of my approval/consent.
I remembered turning 40 and I was okay with that. No big deal. At 40, I still felt young and vibrant with lots of hope, with an enthusiastic outlook on life, and still believed all things were possible as long as you worked hard and stayed focused in trying to accomplish your dreams.
Well I no longer believe. Turning 50 has rocked me to my core along with my bought with Breast Cancer.
What happened from age 40 to 50 to crush my dreams? Let’s look at the timeline as I remembered it!
I continued my education later on in life because I was not happy with career opportunities available to me without a degree. I attained not one but two undergraduate degrees and graduated magna cum laude and summa cum laude in my late 30’s.
I went to law school for two years, hated it so much I said forget this. Law school was not for me. One day as I was sitting in Criminal Law and looking around the room as the law professor was talking about case-law for the 1800s, I noticed that this room is not conducive to an optimal learning environment. Now let me remind you, I was there to learn the law not as an interior designer to observe and develop a functional learning environment.
I’m a visual person as you can readily see by how my blog is designed. Everything for me is a visual. I see places and things before I take notice of people. So needless to say the practice of law was not my calling and I called it quits.
So at 42, I packed up my law books and moved back to where I came from to do what, I did not know. Law school was not a total waste of time because I did utilize my legal education by becoming a Corporate Legal Analyst for a few years.
Okay, here we are again back at 50 and the purpose of this blog post. At 50, this is not how my life was supposed to have turned out. I should be a world-renowned Interior Designer living in Rome, Italy with Olivier Martinez, Actor from the movie, Unfaithful fitting into a size 8.
What happened, how did my dreams get so far off track and how do I redirect/turnaround my life. How can someone who is so analytical not be able to figure this out?
Okay, again, let’ get back to the reason of this post and AARP (sorry about wandering!)
At first I was just going to throw the AARP letter away but then I decided to get online and take a look at their website. So I logged on and pulled up the homepage. I browsed the various tabs for a few minutes to see what AARP had to offer us “OLD PEOPLE”. Not seeing much that impressed me, I logged off and did not give it anymore thought.
Well later on that evening, I decided to get back online to checkout my blog and to see what my fellow bloggers had posted. I’m logged on and cruising the Internet before checking out my blog and I noticed everywhere I went online was displaying Google Ad for AARP. Okay, now I’m really getting pissed.
Not only did they send me a letter the day before my 50th B’day to remind me that I’m getting old >>> but now they have taken over my web browsing with targeted ads from just one visit to their website.
Now I know that Google has an ad-targeting system that tracks where you go on the web, and tailors future ads to your interests but this was the first time this has happened to me only after one visit to a website. This creeped me out big time.
I had to go clear my browsing history, cookies and temporary files to get rid of the AARP ads being displayed wherever I went online. By now, I’m so upset I can hardly contain myself.
AT THIS POINT, I WOULD NOT HAVE JOINED AARP EVEN IF GOD HIMSELF HAD TOLD ME TOO.”
I’ve thrown away the AARP letter, I’ve removed all traces of their predatory tracking methods from my computer browsing history and at this point I’m trying to calm myself down and just forget about the whole crazy ordeal.
Now let me remind you this has occupied virtually my entire day and has produced a considerable about of anxiety/stress on yours truly.
So it’s nighttime now and I’m ready to go to bed and decided to watch a little TV before dosing off.
Halfway between consciousness and REM sleep, I hear on the TV someone saying “GET OVER IT”. I said to myself that sounds like Betty White. Now, I love me some Betty White so I raised up a little to see what she was saying.
Let me tell you right now, I was not ready for what I was about to see and if I had a weak heart, I would have been dead right then and their. THIS IS WHAT I WATCHED IN DISBELIEF ON MY TELEVISION SCREEN!
Are you laughing right now as hard as I was watching this TV spot for AARP? Okay, now I know a higher power had taken over and it was meant to be. You just cannot fight destiny. There is nothing else on this earth that could have persuaded me to join AARP other than my girl, Betty White.
